All Hokie, All the Time. Period. Presented by

The Lounge Board

Newt

Joined: 10/08/1999 Posts: 33416
Likes: 9085

What's this?

A little white knucklingI was highly motivated by embarrassment.


I had been drinking more and more over the previous twenty years to cope with an increasingly stressful job and caring for our parents as they took turns falling into the terminal decline.

It came to a head on May 19, 2014 when my S.O. was out of town for the weekend. I had had extensive knee surgery 6 weeks prior and was still using a brace and crutches. I started drinking 100 proof Evan early that morning. Then at around 5 pm, I climbed into my minivan and went to see my work friend's band at a local winery. The wine went down like water, glass after glass. I wobbled to a place in the pasture to sit and watch the band. At some point, I noticed that a local craft brewer had a tent and I thought that it would be a great idea to try some of their beer. In the middle of my second strong beer, I decided that I needed to visit the Churchill (Don's John, port-a-potty). I made it inside, but began sliding down the wall. So I wallowed out somehow and precariously teetered my way across the field until the spinning world and unnatural gravitational pull caught me and slammed me to earth, crutches, brace and all.

I remember one lady walking past me and screaming at me, "YOUR'RE NOT DRIVING, ARE YOU?!" At that moment, clarity came to me, and I muttered, "No mam." Moments later, one of my colleagues found me, stood over me, and asked for my keys. I gladly surrendered them. Then she went out and found another colleague to take me home. They will forever be saints to me.

When I got home, I had a meeting with myself and told myself, that I had two choices. Did I want to continue "Dancing With the Genie" at age 54 or did I want to live. I chose life.

It was easy for the first few days, because I was literally sick of booze. Gradually as I recovered, the urge to drink came back strongly, but my total and complete public embarrassment was a stronger motivator. So, after about three years, I'm still dry and the urge for spirits is well-suppressed. I'm always on guard, however, because I know that the genie still haunts me, probing for weakness.

Now if I can just find a way to quit drinking Diet Coke and snorting powders.

Adore
by Savages

If only I didn't want the world
I wouldn't make you feel so sad
I'm sure my shame would be gone
Is it human to adore life?

If only I'd hidden my lust
And starved a little bit more
If only I didn't ask for more
Is it human to adore life?

I adore life

If only I'd lived beyond regret
I wouldn't feel guilt for what I take
Is it human to ask for more?
Is it human to adore life?

I know evil when I see it
I know good and I just do it
If I hadn't been so starved
Is it human to adore life?

I understand the urgency of life
In the distance there is truth which cuts like a knife
Maybe I will die maybe tomorrow so I need to say

I adore life

If only I had been more shy
And hid every tear I cried
If only I didn't wish to die
Is it human to adore life?

If only I didn't care so much
For the feel of your cold, cold touch
In every bed I leave behind
Is it human to adore life?

I understand the urgency of life
In the distance there is truth which cuts like a knife
Maybe I will die maybe tomorrow so I need to say

I adore life

I adore life
Do you adore life?
[Post edited by Newt at 04/26/2017 8:24PM]

(In response to this post by HoutexHokie)

Link: Adore


Posted: 04/26/2017 at 6:37PM


+14

Insert a Link

Enter the title of the link here:


Enter the full web address of the link here -- include the "http://" part:


75
Hide This

Current Thread:
 
  3 days sober >>>> -- VT Pops 04/26/2017 3:21PM
  LOL! Still, I was beaming with pride from your initial effort. ** -- Coach McGuirk 04/26/2017 9:00PM
  Veni vidi vici. Let the good times roll... -- chumley 04/26/2017 6:38PM
  3 sips into first glass of cab today. Sorry, am late. ** -- PhotoHokieNC 04/26/2017 5:10PM
  Just popped a cold one---------------->>>>>>>>> ** -- Stork 04/26/2017 4:20PM
  6 days sober, will remedy that very soon.---------> ** -- thankbud 04/26/2017 3:55PM
  Coming up on 3 years sober (May 19) >>>> ** -- Newt 04/26/2017 3:36PM
  White knuckling ? AA? ** -- HoutexHokie 04/26/2017 5:52PM
  Not bad for a retired carnival barker -- 76 B210 04/26/2017 4:33PM
  So "sober" is a relative term? ** -- 133743Hokie 04/26/2017 5:59PM
  Crack? ** -- CPRVHokie 04/26/2017 4:36PM
  No, but it frequently involves a pipe** -- 76 B210 04/26/2017 4:38PM
  4 days in to a bender ----------> ** -- FfxStationHokie 04/26/2017 3:26PM
  I'll be starting day 1 tonight or tomorrow. Golf trip this weekend. ** -- vt90 04/26/2017 3:28PM
  Where? ** -- statmanfromHCyrs 04/26/2017 3:39PM
  Williamsburg. More about the beer and laughter than the golf ... -- vt90 04/26/2017 3:49PM
  Playing Kingsmill? ** -- JKHokie-RunFor32 04/26/2017 3:56PM
  No ... -- vt90 04/26/2017 3:59PM
  Kiskiack? -- Stork 04/26/2017 4:22PM
  Ford's Colony and Williamsburg National ... -- vt90 04/26/2017 5:01PM
  Hit the Green Leafe afterwards. Plenty more beers. -- Stork 04/26/2017 5:46PM
  Back in the day, Fords Colony was nice. -- VT Pops 04/26/2017 5:43PM
  Jungle Golf? ** -- 48zip 04/26/2017 4:13PM
  Why? Did you lose a bet? ** -- vt90 04/26/2017 3:25PM
  Poor time management ** -- VT Pops 04/26/2017 3:26PM

Tech Sideline is Presented By:

Our Sponsors








vm307